Friends! I have the most wonderful and amazing news to share with you all. After almost 4 years of dealing with infertility issues I’m so excited to announce that we are (finally!) expecting a second child the first week of November. Hooray!!! I’ve had the hardest time keeping this a secret since finding out, but with so much difficulty and heartache getting to this point I’ve been too terrified; and also been in complete shock now that things are so far progressing healthy and happily.
I haven’t really talked much about our infertility issues here, which has felt disingenuous to you all and I apologize. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve drafted up posts in my head, wanting to reach out and share with you all our journey. As much as I wanted to connect with others for support, I also was feeling too desperate and vulnerable to open myself up to advice.
Pregnancy is a funny thing, we don’t completely understand what all happens on the cellular level, and may not ever know why it doesn’t work, or one day after years of treatments and trying, it does work. Our doctor told us once after yet another failed fertility treatment that they don’t understand 90% of how conception happens. 90%!! And this was from one of the most respected practices in No. California! I wanted to feel confident about the path we were on in our treatments and feel good about the care we were being given so it was something I decided to keep private from the internet until we were on the other side of it. I hope you understand.
And here we are! On the other side! Finally pregnant and happy and wonderfully grateful for this little miracle for our family. However, the sting of years of devastating loss and disappointment month after month (let alone the financial costs) is still raw and tender to me, and I’m spilling over with things I want to talk about regarding infertility, and particularly secondary infertility as I feel like it’s a whole different package of unique struggles and challenges. My heart just aches for any of you in the middle of a similar journey for a child and I just want to sit with you, eat a big bowl of ice cream and have a good long cry together over the ridiculous of it all.
So! This post is the first in a series of 3 posts I’ll be sharing over the next couple weeks about our journey with secondary infertility. It will be a good way for me to process what we’ve been through and perhaps might be interesting to some that are going through a similar process, or know someone that is.
I’ve been more excited to start talking about my infertility journey than even announcing the pregnancy so hooray for being able to do both! Today is a good good day.